Balancing Act

So I have been back in the United States for a little over a week now and I have finally gotten a chance to sit down and reflect. 

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I can definitely say that my time in Dubai ended on a good note, I couldn't have asked for a better last few days. I pulled an all-nighter before my plane ride home at 6:00am

The night before my flight I met up with my  Italian/Russian friend Claudia for a few hours.

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My roommates decided to go to White Club that night because there was a guest DJ they supposedly wanted to see, but I decided to spend my last night at my favorite club, so I after hanging out with Claudia I took a taxi to Mahiki one last time.

I stood by the bar and danced and talked with my close friend, Marco, who was bar tending. There was a part of me that was bummed that I wouldn't get to spend my last night with Julia but I knew that I would see her in the morning before I left.

Around midnight someone tapped me on the shoulder as I was standing at the bar, I turned around to see Julia and my 3 other roommates (Milan, Christian, and Katya) and Julia's 'boyfriend' Morocco. My jaw literally dropped in complete shock, I was overwhelmed with joy to see all my roommates standing before me. Even though we didn't have a table or free drinks they still chose to hangout with me on my last night in Dubai. I don't think they will ever truly know how much it meant to me. 

Marco was extremely generous and bought us multiple rounds of shots. We all went to the dance floor and shook it until the club closed at 3:00am. When the lights went up I walked all of my roommates out to the line of taxis and said my goodbyes (I even gave Katya a hug). I went back into Mahiki and said good bye to all of the security guards while I waited for Marco. 

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The crew (Anya, Ajona, Chloe, Mari, Jeremy, Marco, and I) caught a cab to McDonalds. My last supper/breakfast in Dubai was with some of my favorite people minus Julia and Claudia at McDonalds...no shame in the game. 

We all said our good byes and I couldn't help but get teary eyed this time around. Marco and I went back to his apartment  because his roommate who also works at Mahiki forgot his key. 

We sat and chatted until about 5:15am and then it was time for another heart aching goodbye. Marco walked me down to my taxi and gave me a long hug goodbye. I cried the whole taxi ride home. 

I remember the silence as I opened the door to my apartment, the dim kitchen light and the eerie shadows dancing on the walls. I tiptoed around my roommates muffled snores as I gathered the last of my things and forced my suitcases shut.

The door bell rang and my driver was here.

I found Julia in the stairwell with Morocco and I said my final goodbyes, more tears, this didn't feel real. Julia was one of my final and hardest good byes. She had made this trip in Dubai worth while. I found comfort knowing that I would see her again some day. 

The drive to the airport was interrupted by exhaustion as I kept dazing in and out of sleep but when the Arabic sun began to rise I stayed awake to admire its beauty one last time. 

My farewell to Dubai couldn't have been more perfect, I hope my 'good bye' will become a 'see you later' as I hope to be back one day. 
 

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I nanny for two lovely girls Kate & Bryn (the lovely girls featured in most of my pictures in the Nanny Diaries portion of my blog). One of Kate's favorite quotes is from the new Disney version of Cinderella. Have courage and be kind. I always thought Disney messages were pretty cheesy & only developed to suite the comprehension of their young audience. On the contrary 'have courage & be kind' has resonated with me throughout the summer. Kate lives by this mantra & for a 7-year-old she possesses more kindness & patience in her finger than some people have in their entire bodies.

Kate taught me to have courage to chase my dreams this summer. Whenever I was distracted from playing Barbie’s by phone calls, emails, & texts about my possible trip to Dubai Kate was nothing but encouraging and patient. I needed sheer honesty & I knew that I would get that from this 7-year-old. One morning when I was making her breakfast I simply asked her "Kate-what should I do? Should I go to Dubai to model?" She looked me straight in the eye & said "Have courage to chase your dreams".

I know taking advice from a 7 year old might not always be the wisest choice because of their lack of understanding of the harshness & reality of the world, etc.. but there was a lot of honesty in her words. I needed to have courage & take a leap of faith or I would never know.

Kate taught me how to be kind to myself. I have struggled & continue to struggle with body image issues. I think everyone does, but in the Industry I work in sometimes my insecurities & obsessions with them are heightened. Kate reminded me to be kind to myself. Whenever I would take the girls for a froyo treat I would stand there & ask myself out loud if I wanted some & Kate would say "Keagan- be kind to your tummy & treat you self. You want a little treat". I recall once Kate made a negative comment about herself & I told her to be kind to herself & that was my moment of recognition. Kate would complement me on my pretty days & snuggle with me on my ugly days but she always found the good in something. Always reminding me in an indirect way to be kind to myself.

Have courage. Have courage to chase your dreams. To tell someone that you love them. To stand up for yourself. To try something new. To let go of things that aren't good for you.

Be kind. To yourself. To your loved ones and strangers. And most one of the most important things I learned in Dubai is be kind to your enemies even if they can’t return the favor. Be kind to your haters because we all have a story to tell and karma will work its way around better than any harsh words but also have courage to stand up for yourself. Simply have courage & be kind.

The amount of excitement that rushed through my body when I found canned pumpkin puree at the market was abnormal. The way I genuinely gasped & lunged for the biggest can I could find was a clear sign that I had Fall Fever & I had it bad.

I proceeded to search for graham crackers so that I could make some form of pumpkin pie snack- I was thoroughly disappointed when my search ended with low fat ginger cookies instead of cinnamon graham crackers. After a long walk back to my apartment I excitedly concocted my fall fix treat. I guess it was like a pumpkin spice dip which consisted of cinnamon, steiva sugar, dash of vanilla almond milk, & pumpkin puree. 

I sat down and ate the entire can along with all of the ginger cookies.

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I really knew I had fall fever bad when I went to the Dubai Mall & the only things I bought were a turtle neck, blanket scarf, & hat- especially considering that it is 95 degrees in Dubai at the moment. I cranked up the AC in the apartment, put on my sweater, scarf, & hat at the same time & proceeded to make myself a cinnamon latte. 

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As much as I love laying on sandy beaches & drinking out of coconuts- I guess you don't know what you're missing until it's gone.

I am truly missing the crunching and colors of falling leaves, cozy sweaters, caramel apples, the Halloween section at Target, ABC's 13 days of Halloween special, and pumpkin spice lattes at Starbucks, (which by the way are making a come-back in Dubai on October 3rd & you better believe I will be the first in line)

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Ladies and gentlemen, 

My fall fever is in full swing. 

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1. You have to pay 5 dirhams for whipped cream on your coffee, as well as 5 dirhams for skimmed milk or a flavor shot. So my Hazelnut Latte with skim milk and whipped cream is basically 15 extra dirhams.

2. At the supermarket if you want a paper bag instead of plastic it costs extra.

3. Chai and Masla Chai are two completely different things..

4.  Arabic tea rooms are not that easy to come by.

5. Every toilet in Dubai has a hose looking thing coming out of the wall next to it for people who don’t want to use toilet paper.

6. There are designated sections on the metro for women and children. Men who violate this rule are fined up to 100 dirhams.

7. Always have sunscreen, water, eye drops, and chap stick.

8. Always carry cash on you.

9. Never assume that cars will stop for you when you cross the street..because they won’t.

10. Karma is really real. The energy you put out in the universe has its way of coming back.

11. A smile is the best accessory even if a grumpy Arabic woman won’t smile back.

12. Live in the moment not on your phone.

13. Do it for the memories not for the Instagram.

14. You cannot please everyone. And there are people in the word that aren’t worth pleasing.

15. Not everyone wants to be your friend and that’s okay but don’t give them a reason to be your enemy.

16. There a lot more important things in life than the way you look. Your appearance is temporary but the impact that you have on people is eternal.

17. Don’t piss off a Serbian.

18. Pakistani food is probably the best kind of spicy food in the entire world, but you should probably take some Prilosec and magnesium after you eat it.

19. I now know how to properly and confidently navigate the metro system.

20. I am thankful that I am a morning person because an Arabic sunrise is probably one of the most breathtaking sights I have ever seen.

21. A lot of Arabic, Indian, Russian, and Slovakian people cannot pronounce my name. 

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